Questions, Questions, Questions!

Today I have been pondering and reflecting on my life as I know it right now and at all the relationships/friendships that I have strained on account of my actions or lack there of. I have come to realize that I lack basic communication skills to fix things. I am not sure how to rectify this issue, but know that as I continue to plead with the Lord and seek answers he will let me in on the secret! I just hope that I am open for the changes that I am going to have to make in order to put my troubled heart at rest. It is my hope that I haven't damaged some of these relationships beyond repair of some level. I am ready to face those demons and see how I can learn from my mistakes. I have much to learn and only hope that my friends can be patient with me and not leave me in the wind during this trial and error process. I am sure that I am going to annoy more than a few and I am sorry about that!! Just know you can tell me that I am annoying you and I will try a different method of fixing things. I am sure that I am going to annoy myself and get frustrated and I ask for understanding as I am undergoing some very drastic changes
I seem to have other things troubling me and I am not sure what they are and can't seem to find peace. I felt peace earlier today and know that it can be attained, but right now I am not sure where it went and how to get it back. I am hoping that as I pray more and turn to the Lord he will give me the peace that I seek and that that peace will last longer and longer. I am sure that this is going to lead me to something that will stretch and in many ways make me a better person. I am hoping that I can make it through this stretch and see that it was just a means for Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ to make me lean on them more and not so much on myself. The balancing game of life is not something that I am good at and I hope that I can learn and gain the means whereby I am able to have the needed strength that that balance gives. We shall see all things happen in time. And I am sure that I will learn how to communicate better as I make mistakes and adjustments so that I can help others as well as myself.
This next week is going to be interesting as I am embarking on another semester and need to have the miracle of a job come my way. I am sure that there will me more posts to follow on that and on the semester at hand. I am sure thinking that even though I am only going half time I am going to be mighty busy and not be able to work on my social life as much as I wanted to, but that is okay maybe it is not time to work on that and really be overwhelmed with life more than I am already. I have faith that I am going to get through this and be the type of person and friend that I have always wanted to become and have run away from as she scares me!! More tomorrow! May the Lord Bless you and keep you.